At some point during his career with the FBI, Robin Dreeke abandoned the “golden rule” — the old adage that you should treat others as you would like to be treated.
He replaced it with another guideline, this one from author and speaker Tony Alessandra, called the “platinum rule”: Treat others as they want to be treated. Talk in terms of what’s important to them, in a way they can readily understand, and they’ll be more inclined to give you what you want.
Dreeke is a Naval Academy graduate, a former Marine, the former head of a federal behavioral analysis program, and a current FBI agent; he recently co-authored “The Code of Trust” with Cameron Stauth.
In the book, Dreeke and Stauth share the system Dreeke developed for implementing the platinum rule most effectively: The Communications Style Inventory..
The system boils down to four different communication styles. Your mission is to figure out which type of person you’re talking to, and to use that knowledge to guide the conversation. The four types are: